r/mildlyinfuriating • u/SteamPunkShrek • 9h ago
Spent an hour clearing this spot yesterday, owner of the bar across the street drove past me and watched me doing it. I left for 15 minutes this morning and he parked there
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u/Top_Cowboy 9h ago edited 2h ago
Park in the bar
Edited to add: Thanks for all of the upvotes, and Awards. I’m glad my inclination toward petty vengeance is appreciated.
Stay safe’s everyone.
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u/mattbatt1 9h ago
In the bar
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u/Technical-Winter-927 8h ago
inside
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u/RedPandaReturns 8h ago
On the bar
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u/Hungry_Research1986 8h ago
So close to the front door, that it can't be opened.
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u/AWholeNewFattitude 9h ago
I had somebody do this to me so I wrote a note on their car and said “thank you for taking my spot. I hope you enjoy what I did to your car.” The truth is, I didn’t do anything, but they spent about a half an hour walking around, trying to figure it out and you know for the next month anytime there’s a knock or noise they’re gonna think about it
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u/bouncypinecone 8h ago
Revenge is a dish best served psychologically.
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u/Slade1111 7h ago
In the end, the greatest snowball isn't a snowball at all; it's fear
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u/MarchCompetitive6235 7h ago
I left a note on someone’s car similar to that. The driver cut me off on the freeway nearly caused a wreck. Then I saw them about a half an hour later parked at the shopping mall I was headed to. The note said:“I dinged your car, sorry.“ Followed by a fake phone number. I bet they went crazy looking for the damage.
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u/Chance-Equivalent501 6h ago
Fake phone number? For a crooked auto body shop? And insurance company? A mega church? The possibilities.
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u/ThePartyShark 6h ago
I used to be a bigger maniac than I am now and when someone would do something I didn’t like, I’d sign them up requesting Scientology information, before they made you verify contact info. Those lunatics take things to a level that would make a Jehovah Witness say “enough already!”
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u/QuantumBitcoin 5h ago
I signed up with the scientologists once in the 1990s in Boston. Just one "e reading". They have found me and sent me info everywhere I've lived since.
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u/Additional_Comment99 4h ago
I don’t know about that. I walked out to my car as the local Jehovah’s Witnesses were door knocking. I waved them off as I had to go get my grandson from preschool. That lady came back weekly for 4 months. I kept telling her politely I was not interested and I didn’t need saving, boy they are persistent.
If I hear them knocking at my house I just pretend I’m not home. Talking to one is like feeding a stray cat, they will never go away. Even if you only say “ no thanks, I’m not interested “ unfortunately I got caught leaving my daughter’s house. Now I check the camera before I open the doors. lol
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u/MrTeeWrecks 4h ago
I had a boss that was an absolute asshole. Fired people wanted to make sure we were in fear. I signed up his corporate E-mail account for so much of the weirdest porn sites I could find. And this was the early 2000’s so he had zero idea how to fix it. My former colleagues said he got a slap on the wrist for it but he was scrutinized a lot more after that by higher ups & behaved more professionally until he retired.
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u/Low_Actuary_2794 6h ago
Use one of the spam numbers that call you.
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u/roger_ramjett 5h ago
Unfortunately spam callers spoof the calling number in call display. So calling back the number will usually get someone who knows nothing about it. Their number was just unlucky to have been picked by the spam software.
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u/Zestyclose-Process92 4h ago
I have explained number spoofing to so many annoyed people who accused me of calling them first. Or really, directed them to Google search the concept because I don't expect them to believe me.
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u/Professional_Log1428 5h ago
I once left a note on someone’s car that was driving very recklessly around me etc. They just happened to be going the same place I was. The note said something like “see how easy it was for me to find you; if I was just a little crazier I’d wait for you to come back out. Maybe next time you’ll drive more carefully orrr maybe next time you’ll do it to someone crazier than me”. Hopefully that made them think twice next time they wanted to drive like an a hole; probably not but it made me happy!
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u/Connee14 9h ago
This is amazing. Now I want to keep pens and paper in my car just so I can't do this to bad/selfish parkers.
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u/poorly-worded 8h ago
Or keep a set of pre-printed cards with that message.
Make sure they are sequentially numbered,, but skip the first 80 or so, so they are stamped with 84/250. 85/250, 86/250.This will make you appear as a seasoned and regular professional in the arena of doing stuff to people's cars.
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u/Aggravating_Pear2898 7h ago
Like starting your first checkbook at 1200. Wait! What's a checkbook?
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u/CommitteeNo167 9h ago
the best thing to keep in your car to write nasty notes is smudge proof lipstick. write on the windshield and when they try to wash it off it will be everywhere. it’s slightly oily so it stays fresh looking all day. just think about how bar glasses have lipstick marks on them, that shit will survive a commercial dishwasher!
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u/even_less_resistance 8h ago
i did this at the NASA museum one time when i came out to a nearly empty lot and a car jammed so close to my door i couldn’t get back in and had to crawl in through the hatch
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u/Remy_Jardin 6h ago
I was thinking this is how "To Neil, with Love" ended up on the capsule, but now the mystery just deepens.
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u/TerrorFromThePeeps 7h ago
If you write it reversed, they will get in the car to read it, and then they will use the wipers as a FIRST resort, guaranteeing the smear. If you write it nornally, they may try wiping it off from outside first, which will be more effective than using the wipers, even if it wont be 100%. But getting them to use wipers forst will definitelt inflict the maximum pain.
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u/ACcbe1986 7h ago
As a man who never wears lipstick, they never suspect it was me!
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u/ArtisticDimension446 5h ago
I've woken from a seizure 4 times to reply to this and can't rember what i wa
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u/Broccoli_Man007 9h ago
You don’t have a pile of 6-7 old pens in your car, next to the comb and pack of gum? That’s just me?
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u/lordkhuzdul 8h ago
The problem with those is that they are all dried out and useless.
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u/ReferenceFabulous830 8h ago
The pens or the gum?
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u/QuentinTarzantino 8h ago
... condoms
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u/coolranchdoritoz 8h ago
Hey I have one too in my center console. From 2021. One day it'll come in handy...Right?
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u/TackleHefty7676 8h ago
I thought the point of them was to not come in handy..
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u/Mode_Appropriate 8h ago
Ive done this a few times actually. The last time was a couple weeks ago. The downtown area in my city has pretty limited street parking. This bozo decided to park in the middle of two spaces, effectively eliminating a space. I drew a picture of the parking spaces and explained how the car is supposed to be inside the two lines. Then drew a picture of his car, how he was parked and how he failed. I also left $1 telling him to apply it towards parking lessons.
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u/SadDingo7070 7h ago
I saw a friend once at Target who had just purchased a brand new car. I saw his car in the parking lot, and I put a note on it that said, “Sorry, I hit your car.”
He said he spent quite some time trying to find the imaginary damage as well. Lol
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u/TealTigress 8h ago
When I was 9 months pregnant, someone parked their giant truck beside my car and I could barely get in. I wrote them a note and put it on their windshield. “Sorry about the dent - 9 months pregnant and couldn’t fit.” I was fine. I made no contact. There was no dent. Thinking back, I might have gotten my husband to move the car so I could get in. It was over 13 years ago.
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u/noncommonGoodsense 8h ago
When I was a kid we use to take pebbles and put them in the air caps so when you screw it on it depresses the valve and lets air out of the tire slowly. We were little shits…
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u/PhilosopherUnique914 7h ago
Put a pebble or ball bearing inside their hub cap, when they are driving they’ll hear the whirring sound and when they stop it goes away. My friend did that to an ex and it took them 4 months before they figured it out.
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u/eww1991 8h ago
Same should be done for people who block pavements when parking. 'Sorry about the scratch, I couldn't get past safely otherwise'. They'll spend ages hunting for it
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u/Sauzage-N-Peppas 8h ago
I love this. I wouldn’t damage anyone’s car for real, I’d say something to their face before I did that…and even that I basically wouldn’t do unless absolutely necessary. But this, this right here is the type of petty revenge that I can really get behind.
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u/Spirited-Nature-1702 8h ago
It’s all fun and games until the you leave a not like this and they pull it from the scene DOA accident because the dudes brake lines burst. Lol
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u/zrad603 9h ago
then their engine blows up 6 months later and the police are investigating
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u/ProTightRoper 7h ago
and the police are investigating
HAHAHAHA this guy actually thinks cops do stuff.
Hint: cops have objectively done a fraction of the work they used to do since their big temper tantrums in 2020 over not getting to execute civilians.
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u/corrosivesoul 8h ago
Go to his bar, get drunk, vomit all over the bar. Messing with his truck is impersonal and illegal. Keep it personal and legal.
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u/CommanderInQueefs 8h ago
Fuck that. Get drunk enough at home first, just before you leave knock 4 shots back so you will still get served at the bar.
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u/Gorkymalorki 7h ago
And once you have been served a bit, have a friend make an anonymous call to whatever your state's alcohol licensing department is and say that a bar is serving someone alcohol and that person is clearly very intoxicated.
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u/littlebugonreddit 7h ago
Then as soon as you see an official walk in, start slurring and waving around!
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u/Hot_Programmer_5810 6h ago
Pull your dick out for added effect
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u/Ruckus292 6h ago
Then yell "Dicks out for Harambe!!"
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u/chiefboldface 5h ago
As a Cincinnatian, we still do that for our fallen comrade.
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u/StretchFrenchTerry 6h ago
Just eat a dozen raw eggs at home, then take a triple shot of Fireball at the bar.
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u/ehtio 8h ago
You don't have to get drunk to vomit. Go to order something and vomit all over the bottles behind. They will have to replace them all
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u/Expensive-Treat-9020 8h ago
Be sure you pre-funk earlier, you don’t want to also waster your hard earned money on him.
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u/chris13se 7h ago
That’s just going to ruin an employees day. A guy like that isn’t cleaning vomit in the bar he owns.
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u/Serious-Ad-5293 9h ago
Cover it with pitchers of water….
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u/HonterChicken 9h ago
Best idea here, and accidentally add more snow behind the vehicle to keep it there
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u/MadRhetoric182 9h ago
Then cover the tire treads in Baby Oil.
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u/Meghan1230 8h ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/fec2455 8h ago
And coat them in baby oil
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u/defeatistphilosopher 8h ago
Then return most of the family, but keep one child to raise as your own.
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u/FriendToPredators 8h ago
Form a little dam of snow around the wheel farthest from the driver’s side and fill it with water a few times until it freezes up through the rims.
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u/MiguelMenendez 6h ago
Did this once in a similar situation with a Mustang. Packed snow around the rear tires and dumped a pitcher of water over the top. Woke up to the glorious sound of a Ford V6 just cooking off the rear tires trying to get out.
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u/User-no-relation 8h ago
Isnt that a private driveway?
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u/Lost-Top3058 5h ago
People seem to underestimate how quickly a tow truck will show up if you call them and tell them someone has parked illegally or on your property without permission. Like call them, go back inside and take a piss, come back out and they’ve already been and gone.
Lived in a house for a couple years that had a driveway and garage, but for whatever reason people didn’t seem to notice the driveway when looking for somewhere to park? Was just a regular thing to step out to go somewhere and someone is parked across the driveway blocking us in. Originally we’d wait and see if someone was just making a quick stop, but after a few months of having to call a tow truck at least once per week we had zero patience or tolerance.
One time a roommate was trying to get to work, someone was parked across the driveway, he called the tow truck and was standing at the front window waiting. Started hearing him, “are you kidding me? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?” and him step outside and start yelling at someone. I go look and he’s arguing with the driver of ANOTHER car that pulled into the “spot” across our driveway after the tow truck literally just grabbed the previous car. This driver said “I’m only going to be 15 minutes, so you can just fuck off.”
Had them towed too.
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u/GoldenPopsicle 4h ago
I'm friends with the local tow yard because of my job. They love picking up illegally parked cars. Free money. Cops won't stop you either.
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u/RedTheRobot 2h ago
Man this really shows how dumb people are. I’m sure your roommate told the guy he just had a car towed.
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u/AshingiiAshuaa 5h ago
This is the critical question. Taking someone's spot they shoveled on the public street is a shitty move but legal. It comes with not having a driveway. But someone parking in your driveway requires swift and firm action.
If he's not in the vehicle and moving immediately when he sees you then deflate his tires or block him in and call a tow truck?
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u/MotoMeow217 5h ago
Yeah this was my thought too. If this is a private driveway OP should just call a tow truck.
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u/The_Gumbo 9h ago
Man, could you imagine if some bird was flying by and dropped some fish into the spot between the windshield and the hood? That would be awful.
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u/ballskindrapes 9h ago
Easy. Get blender. Blend can of tuna. Pour down into that spot.
Best part is it will freeze and he will forget about this, but when it heats up.....oh boy.
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u/Rustic-Duck 7h ago
The canned salmon with skin on is the absolute worst smell when it goes….
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u/misterpickles69 7h ago
I’m sure there’s a fermented shark product that might take the cake here.
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u/CantankerousOrder 9h ago
Or between the bed and body. Like really deep too. I hear birds love anchovy paste.
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u/Tgsheufhencudbxbsiwy 9h ago
You can tell the people who don’t live in snow areas in the comment section here.
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u/remuliini 8h ago
I live in snow area, and I can't get past the "an hour?!?"
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u/Help_meToo 8h ago
Plus it looks like his driveway isn't sholved. I am assuming the truck is in a driveway.
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u/blahnlahblah0213 8h ago
Yeah, I don't know what's going on with this post.This looks like it's a private property driveway. So if this was a real post, why wouldn't you just have the guy towed? But why would the guy park in his driveway in the first place?
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u/FiveUpsideDown 6h ago
The reason a person told me he did it was “I was just checking on my elderly mother. There was no street parking because of the snow. I had no choice except to park in a cleared spot. Besides, it’s not reserved parking. I’m not hurting anyone.” By the way the “elderly mother” was a 25 yr old girlfriend of the man.
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u/IAmReborn11111 8h ago
OP didn't mention they cleared it with a spoon
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u/BrownEyeBearBoy 6h ago
Idk about OP but I shoveled my driveway 7 times yesterday. I woke up to about 6" (giggity) and shoveled every time it acculutated another inch or so, so it would be less taxing on my body. In the end we got about 12-14" of snow.
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u/Cent1234 6h ago
It's this. Go out when it's an inch, and you take ten minutes to essentially sweep the driveway.
Wait until the morning, and you're in for a workout.
Unless you have a snowblower. Then you just do it once.
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u/9yr0ld 7h ago
It’s like an inch of snow and the “parking spot” is still covered in snow. What was cleared lol
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u/ChrisRiley_42 7h ago
There's hardly any snow there.. How does it take an hour to clear that.
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u/anominous27 6h ago
I dont live in a snow area, but why was OP shoveling a spot that wasnt his? Or why did someone else park in OP's spot, cant he just tow it/have it towed/ticketed? It makes no sense
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u/SleepyLakeBear 8h ago
Park in front of the door of the bar. Like a few inches away. Leave a note that says "I'll trade spots with you. Move your truck, and I'll move mine."
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u/Mysterious-Tie7039 8h ago
Take a customer parking spot at the bar. Tell the owner since he took your spot, you’re taking one of his.
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u/beepbeepboop74656 8h ago
In Chicago we’d cover that car with water and then snow pack.
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u/My_Fridge 8h ago
Had someone do this to me a couple years ago. Cleared a spot for my mom to park at so she could safely walk up to the apartment. This dude stops by and asks if his girl can park there, I'm at this point not even a quarter of the way clearing the ice and snow and say, "Nah man, I'm not done and this spot is for my mom so she doesn't slip and fall crossing the road." Dude is like alright no problem and leaves, I finish up and checking the time see my mom should be home literally any minute and decide to head inside. Almost as soon as the door shuts dickhead and his girlfriend pull into the spot and proceed to stay parked there for over a week and my mom had to walk across the road covered in ice and snow. They didnt even live there, they lived up the road but because I cleared a spot they needed it. Man I still get pissed about it too because there was so many spaces for them to take literally anywhere else and they had to take the one so far down the road from where they lived.
The only thing that came out of it was that several months later I got their car ticketed and towed because the girlfriend couldn't drive or park for shit. Ended up parking in a way that both blocked a side road and part of the main road that caused people to need to swerve around them. I guess they just parked their shit and walked up the road never caring about anything.
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u/Mtn_Grower_802 8h ago
You know water freezes locks shut when poured on frozen vehicles. Use several layers of water to get the right thickness.
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u/jess_the_werefox 9h ago
People in the comments here really lose the point of “mildly infuriating.” Was it illegal? No. Was it a dick move? Yes! Personally if I saw someone shoveling out a public parking space, I wouldn’t just park my ass there! I’d shovel out my own fucking space
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u/jmattspartacus 8h ago
Doesn't quite look like street parking to me.
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u/IanDre127 8h ago
Right, it’s perpendicular to the road between a house and a telephone pole support line just wide enough for one car… this feels like a driveway…. Not even wide enough for an alley
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u/Kurotan 7h ago
This is what I think someone's driveway. Which makes this incredibly infuriating and I would be calling a tow truck to remove him.
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u/molten-glass 8h ago
Is parking in someone else's driveway not trespassing?
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u/jess_the_werefox 8h ago
In the comments OP states it’s more like an unmonitored parking lot, so not a driveway. If someone just randomly parked in your driveway, that’s way more that mildly infuriating lol
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u/Invisible_Target 6h ago
Idk why everyone is assuming it’s malicious. Maybe the guy assumed op was leaving for the day
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u/Glass-Sheepherder-16 9h ago
Put up a hand drawn sign that says: 'The food at the bar DOES NOT give people food poisoning!'
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u/lauragravesart 8h ago
I’m so petty, I’d probably shovel the snow all back. Especially around his tires.
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u/DedTV 8h ago
Sub freezing temps?
Id turn on the hose and encapsulate the vehicle in 3 inches of ice.
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u/darkmoonfirelyte 8h ago
I had someone do this once. So I dug out a new spot right behind them and buried their car under all the snow. By the time they came out their car was stuck and my new spot was nice and clean. They bitched me out hard, but I just smiled.
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u/TheOgGhadTurner 7h ago
I wouldn’t have even stuck around for it. I’d be throwing some snow on the bumper to cover my plates up and dipping
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u/Vitev008 7h ago
I once spent 3 hours getting my car unstuck from street parking after a heavy snowfall.
I come back 10 minutes later after grabbing breakfast to my spot taken. There was no where else to park, so I had to just leave my car in the middle of the road, with the chance of someone smashing into it while I dug up a spot in front of that spot stealer, and you bet your ass I covered their car while doing it.
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u/JibboSequence 6h ago
There was a family on my street who always had to have the spot right in front of my house. The family had 4 cars, so someone was always at the ready to take it as soon as it was available. When we would visit, the wife would watch out the window like a hawk and go nuts when it was free and either rush out or send anyone else to take it. She used to Karen-brag to us “you bought the house, not the street”.
So one day we got a blizzard. She spends all her time shoveling out the spot. Before she can take it, my downstairs tenant parked in it. She got bullshit. Granted, it was a dick move, but for her shitty attitude over the spot in the first place, it was karma.
All I could think of was “you bought the house, not the street”. 😂
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u/Pissjug9000 8h ago
While I enjoy all the suggestions here, there is only 1 answer. You gotta shit on their windshield. There is no other way. You must send a message. You must assert your dominance.
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u/MrLivefromthe215 8h ago
Don't leave DNA at a scene, get animal shit/ piss instead.
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u/slatebluegrey 7h ago
You think the police are going to get a DNA sample? They would need a warrant. The judge would ask for probable cause. “Because the truck owner took the popper’s parking space”
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u/ramriot 9h ago
Go over and thank them for reserving your spot while you briefly popped out, it was so neighborly of them, but you are back now & they can move their truck back again.
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u/CantankerousOrder 9h ago
Is he on your property? Rented or owned if you have rights to that spot have him towed.
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u/SuperannuatedAuntie 8h ago
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u/ahuramazdobbs19 7h ago
Was about to say “OP, do you not come from a place where chair law is the law?”
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u/TShowalter 8h ago
Blizzard in Baltimore in the 90s. I spent two hours shoveling out my spot. It was feet of snow. Spots were universal on any other day, but not with snow. If you shoveled it, it’s your spot until it melts. I bought groceries and came back to someone in my spot. I had to double park and shovel out a new spot. I parked, put my groceries away, and spent an hour covering their car until you couldn’t see it. A white mountain. The sidewalks were clear. Other spots were now open. Not my finest moment, but it felt good at the time.